Jason's Daily Notes

Went to Father's Office last night. With Louise. It was packed. Definitely not a comfortable place to hang out. Met Stephanie and Paulina there.
Then milkshakes at Cafe 50's.

I got pulled over by the police. FUCK.

I AM NOT HAPPY.

New word: Povertous

I couldn't sleep well last night. Had too much of a big dinner, and the milkshakes didn't help. Plus, I was worrying non-stop about this traffic ticket and MY UPCOMING COURT DATE!!!! So yeah, I couldn't sleep because I was too fucking pissed. At the system. At the world. At myself.

I feel like a failure.

Lunch: with Jenn. Drove to Chipotle at 11:30 am. The coupon I had had expired. FAIL.

I saw my bike in Westwood. Louise?

I let Stephanie borrow my credit card to pay for her flights. She came over after lunch to pay me back in cash.
Talked to mom. She calmed me down. A lot.
Music: Red Hot Chili Peppers - Under the Bridge; Mumford and Sons - The Cave

So I got pulled over by the police last night. For making a u-turn in front of a police car, causing the policeman to step on his brakes. As a result, I have been feeling angry, depressed, and like a failure. I've been trying to vent to my friends, and they've replied with variations of "that sucks," and it has helped me feel better a little bit, but I still felt really dejected, and frankly like a failure.

Well, I just got off the phone with my mom, and told her about my experience. And I expected her to be hard on me, expressing some sort of disappointment in what I've done wrong. But she didn't. She simply said, "oh well - that's part of life. It happens to everyone." And she said it with the resigned certainty that only comes with life experience. She knows that it's not a good thing, but it's not a major life setback, and that it's not worth it to waste my energy worrying about it. In a matter of seconds, the weight of my guilt and anger simply lifted off of me. None of my friends could have done that. Only mom. So as much as I may feel embarrased by her, or feel that she's out-of-touch with our current generation; I really have to acknowledge that my mom knows a thing or two about life. And I'd be all the wiser to pay attention to what she says.

Went to Tommy's last night with Matthias. Louise didn't make it back in time and just insisted that we go without her.

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I walked to work today. I would have biked, but Louise took the bike. She also took the laptop with her, for a skype interview.
I don't know what the hell I'm doing this summer. Really.
Lunch: Jenn came to visit me! Korean BBQ at the mall food court.
Cassy got accepted to Harvard! :)

It's really warm. Borderline hot.


I love it. I'm wearing shorts today.

Father's Office tonight. Gotta walk back to the apartment first.

Went to Norms last night with Louise. The Apple Pan was closed (on Mondays?!) so I detoured us to Norms. Louise now has a list of LA places to visit, this being her last week here.
Uploaded some pics to Shutterfly, so that I can compile a photo book as I have been meaning to do.
It was really windy last night. As we were driving, there was a palm tree next to the Westside Pavilion that was bent almost halfway over, looking like it was really about to snap!

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The Chuck DVD wouldn't play. So I just mailed it back to Netflix.
My usual parking spaces were taken this morning. I felt irked. Funny how the little things in life are the ones that make or break your day. (This is probably partly why so many wealthy people are unhappy.)
Bloomberg training this morning. I didn't really want to do it, so I tried to avoid it. But I had to find a case, and with three people looking over my shoulder, I felt really uncomfortable doing my job.

Can I write left handed? (yes - but badly and slowly)
Lunch: leftover pita from yesterday. meh. it's soggy and the meat is tough.
I'm feeling negative. Going through a negative phase. Just in a foul mood today. And in theory, things are going so well for me in my life.
I still haven't told the firm that I'm leaving.
The weather is nice. It could be warmer, though.

Slept at my West LA apartment last night. Went for a night drive to the Palisades. Windows down, music loud, no cares, the ocean on one side - THIS IS WHAT I'LL MISS ABOUT LOS ANGELES.
Didn't go out or anything. Watched TAR and Daniel Tosh. The Lakers beat the first-place Spurs in a blowout.

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Music: 30 Seconds to Mars - Closer to the Edge
I voted. Well, mailed in my vote-by-mail ballot. But I didn't put a stamp on it. Fucking cheap-ass election office, you're not going to make me have to pay to vote. Even if it is only $0.44.
Lunch: Big Fat Pita. They are a big fat ripoff. Charged me $9.75 for something listed on the menu as $8.50. I spoke with the owner, who said that they were updating the menus and that what I ordered was a "special." What the hell. At least I got My $1.25 back.

I'm sleepy and feeling melancholy this afternoon. Feeling lonely. Thinking about my life. Do people, my friends, really need me?


http://fuckyeahnouns.com/

Fri night: Good luck bar. Got to announce my plans to leave. Realized that it's actually sad, because I'm probably not going to be back in LA for years. Didn't think about that :(

No Joshua Tree camping this weekend.

Saturday: Home.
Southwest regional Barista Championships at Siren Studios in Hollywood. Cool. Felt like I was on the set of a Food Network TV show.
Vegan dinner in Silverlake. Me, MM, Omri, Daniela, and their (former) manager Sara. I had a reuben sandwich. I was so hungry, it was scarfed down almost instantly. Yum.
Then, gelato. So sweet. So rich. Walked around, I was gonna get a tattoo, but the shop was already closed. Hung out at Omri's and reminisced about the 90s. No where to watch a movie. I drove Daniela home.

Sunday: Got dragged to church. I don't have the heart to tell everyone there that I totally despise the Catholic Church, and religious institutions in general. The hypocrisy of it is unbelievable. Had Thai food afterwards. Gave advice to the DeLeon family about their upcoming trip to London. Wish I were there already.
Cleaned my room (relatives are coming to visit this next weekend) and headed to West LA. Not much else going on.

SBS meeting last night. Then Maria (from CL) came to look at the elliptical. No deal (yet?).
Stayed at my mom's house.
Dreamt that I was at Loyola. High school, weird.
Slept in. Again?! 9:30pm - 8:30am. HOW AM I SLEEPING SO MUCH?!

It was late and a Friday, so I took a gamble: Drove the freeway in to work. It was clear and fast, at least until I got off at La Cienega. It was 9:45 when I arrived at work.

Music: The Kooks - Naive; Daft Punk - Harder Better Faster Stronger
Lunch: Fuddruckers veggie burger
The weather is perfect. 72 and sunny.
Dinner with Adrian and co. tonight.
Happy about life. And things. :)

I am addicted to sleep.

Fell asleep on the futon at 7:15pm. Woke up at 9:15 as Modern Family was on (I had left the TV on).
Fell asleep again at 10:15. Woke up 7:15 am.
That's 11 hours of sleep. It felt damn good.
Watched the premiere of The Amazing Race on my laptop this morning.

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I should read the Koran.
Lunch: Subway footlong.

Jenn got accepted to San Diego; Cassy got into Cal!
Music: Cold War Kids - Royal Blue. Seriously, I heard this song this morning on NPR and simply had to find out who it was. And I've been listening to it all day. I don't know why, but I find it amazing.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GS8NYRLU-xs