Jason's Daily Notes

I'm just feeling very uninspired today. Almost depressed. I just don't feel like talking to or seeing anyone. I think I've just had too much social interaction since arriving at LSE. It's been non-stop. I don't think I can handle that kind of lifestyle, you know, "work hard play hard" - I'm more of a "work less, chill out" kind of personality... the complete opposite of most of my classmates. Sigh.

I couldn't sleep again last night. Weird - I submitted my marketing essay on Friday, so I should have been much more relaxed and easy. I just don't have energy. I feel like I've gained weight too. I think I have such a slow metabolism.

I went on a random excursion to the Tate Modern. But there, I didn't really feel like browsing art. I just needed to get out of the house. I then took the tube to Canary Wharf, then skyped home to discover that I'm in one of the pictures in the latest Berkeley Study Abroad newsletter.

Now I'm off

I slept early last night, and I set my alarm for 7:30 so that I could work on my Marketing essay which is due tomorrow.
I woke up at 10.

Rushed to eat breakfast and get my things ready. Was about to shower, when I hear the shower turn on.
Swag was taking a shower. So I just rinsed my mouth with mouthwash and washed in the kitchen sink.

I was going to take the bus to the tube station, when I remembered that my travelcard expired yesterday, and I hadn't renewed it yet.
When I got to the station, the ticket stand was closed. The automated machines wouldn't accept any of my credit card.

No time. I had to rush. But I couldn't afford to take my usual tube-bus route to school, so I'd have to take the tube all the way around to Holborn. I had to take the Piccadilly Line, and for some reason at 11am, everybody was arriving from Heathrow, so I couldn't even walk without being blocked by 4 big pieces of luggage.

I ran out of the station, up the really long escalators, and to class, only about 10 minutes late. Everyone could notice that I was panting and sweating.

The class finished not a minute too soon. I had to submit my essay. It was due within 1 hour. I had it printed out, but I had made an important change and needed to re-print one page. I log into the computer lab, and print it out. What happened next was just the universe rubbing it in my face: Instead of one page printing, it had an error and printed out like 20+ pages with nothing but a few random characters on each page. No. Fucking. Way. I tried printing again 3 times, but no luck.

I went to the library to print it out. I log in to a computer there, and I swear it was the slowest computer I've ever encountered at LSE. It took 7 minutes for me to log on, and another couple minutes to open my document, and another couple minutes for the printer to come online. I had to clear a paper jam.

But Hallelujah! It printed out. I rushed back to the NAB and submitted my essay.

Now I have to write another essay, 2500 words, on Starbucks. Here we go...

Another week, another set of deadlines, and another set of problems have cropped up in my life.

It's week 7, which means I'm already most of the way through my term at LSE. Starting next week, I'll start submitting summative coursework (meaning my work will actually count toward my final grade) - the pressure is on!

I have 2 essays that I'm continuing to worry about. I also had to help with a Development Society presentation yesterday, which took up my afternoon and evening.

Monday: I had a full day of classes, during which I was reminded to really get grinding on my essays. My classmates are already ahead of me (how they do it? I don't know - I've been doing reading and taking notes every day)! Sickness abounds and I'm making sure that I keep my hands washed and clean at every opportunity so as not to get sick. Anyway, as I do every Monday, I went to swing dancing class, probably the highlight of my week, and afterwards I come home, exhausted, and hang with the flatmates while having some garlic bread for dinner. A few minutes later, the police arrive at the apartment and knock on our door! They had received a complaint from the woman living upstairs that she had noticed a man standing outside our flat and looking into the windows for over an hour. She found this really suspicious and reported him. Luckily nothing actually happened, they just issued us a warning to be vigilent. The girls found it scary and disconcerting; I was just laughing so much at how much it reminded me of the Bed Intruder that we know so well from that YouTube song.

Tuesday: I recovered slightly from my cold. Bought some things from Tesco. Stayed in the apartment the whole day and tried to make some progress on my essays, but not much resulted. I had one class, 5-6pm, which I quickly went to and went back home. It seemed somewhat useless to go to that class, and the teacher is starting to get on my nerves with his OCD-like tendencies and general assertively nervous personality. I came home and prepared dinner: a tofu stir-fry. I had invited someone over who was looking for a new place to live, Alec from New Zealand. He joined Swag and I for dinner. He seems nice, he's working in marketing for a sort of novelty company in Brixton and simply hates his current living situation. I was more surprised that he had never eated tofu before!

Wednesday: I went to my final presentation skills class at 10am, or at least I tried to, because there was a big traffic jam on Waterloo bridge. The buses were backed up across the entire bridge - so the driver just opened the doors for us right there, and I walked from the bridge to campus. I was 15 minutes late. Great. During the class I got a text from Swag saying that my passport had arrived, so I responded telling him to open it. Later, I got from his voicemail that my visa had been denied. Because they couldn't process my credit card.

Bad news! I have spent so much time dealing with the frustrations of my UK student visa: From driving to the application centre on Fairfax last spring, to getting stopped at the Manchester Airport for nearly 30 minutes in June, to having my loan letters shipped from LA to London and spending a day getting photos and documents together for my submission. I wasn't able to register at LSE because I didn't have my passport on me. I couldn't open a bank account because I didn't have my passport with me. And then the whole problem of my application arriving at my old address, meaning that I had to travel across all of London three times just to find out that they had shipped it back already! I'm conservatively estimating that's 18 hours of my life wasted already. All that effort, and now I find that I have nothing to show for it.

I'm not angry; I'm just building up such a strong resentment toward the UK and it's system right now. I have absolutely no intention of working or living here after I'm done with my studies. I don't even want to do business with UK companies.

So, Thursday: I woke up early to see if I could finally open a bank account, now that I have my passport. (I need a bank account so I could just access the money in my loan cheque!) I walk there, and after being referred to some sort of manager, he looks at my passport and sees that I don't have a proper visa, that my current visa expires next month. So he says he can't do anything.

Fuck.

My options right now are either to stay in the country (illegally) until I fly back to the US, spend an extra $600 or whatever to buy a new flight before my current visa expires in December, or risk another visa application that could take 2 months or more (and cost £400+) and might mean that I wouldn't be allowed to travel to the states for my international term.

I'm still very busy with schoolwork. I tried to accomplish some reading/research yesterday (Sunday) at the library, and I did get some done, but it's frustrating that after 3 hours I could only get partway through 1 book.

Swag and Nike went to Leeds. They hitchhiked Friday night and returned Sunday afternoon.

There were 3 couchsurfers over, who were technically Swag's guests, but they became mine when Swag left for Leeds.

9 November 2011


I’m at the library, working on a paper that will take days of reading. I have so much work to do, it’s unbelievable. Let’s just go down my current to-do list, shall we?

• Research dissertation topic – find professors that fit topic

• Research/work on Business in the Global Environment paper (contrasting trade post-crisis) (2 weeks)

• Work on strategy group presentation (Thursday!)

• Work on strategy hand-in exercise (next week)

• Work on Systems Thinking essay (3 weeks)

• Read case study (Burberry) for Marketing (Thursday)

• Work on presentation skills journal

• Research potential events for development society

• Meet with Azeem

• Meet with Louise (make up for birthday fail)

• Make appointment with career counsellor

• Follow-up with Duke regarding registration

• Catch up with Marketing (watch missed lecture)

• Research career options: Shell, Amex, Novo Nordisk, etc.

• Transfer loan money into main account

• Pay credit card

• Buy food

• Find time to skype

• Go out with IMEX classmates for dinner/drinks

• Go out with M&S classmates for dinner/drinks

• Respond to couchsurfing requests

• Meet with Flora / HB society re: receipts

• Inquire with student office about event reimbursement (DevSoc)

• Swing dancing with Jane (?)

Welcome to my life. Things have been busy since day 1 of term here, and now that I’m in week 6 (day 40 or something), I barely have time for myself. There’s no way I can sustain a blog at this rate, and my former habit of journaling/documenting my daily excursions has fallen by the wayside. I can barely remember the names of all the people I meet each day, though I’m trying my best.

It all sounds horrible and overwhelming, I know. But the fact is that it’s really fun. I’m feeling challenged and I’m becoming more focused than I have ever been. I don’t know how my classmates get by without feeling constantly stressed (I’m sure they do. They just don’t show it.), because they’re ahead of me in applying for jobs, and several already have their own companies that they’re running (impressive, eh?). I am just trying to get through this term with decent grades. I can figure out my career afterwards, although I’m feeling really attracted to doing something entrepreneurial and independent. And my classes are so interesting! I’m really enjoying learning about different marketing strategies, the behaviour of consumers, global competition in various industries, competitive strategies for companies, how to keep an audience’s attention, and what kind of feedback loops occur in everyday life! Did I mention that famous classical pianists and guitarists come every week for a free concert? And that there’s free vegetarian (Hare Krishna) food on campus everyday?

London has been good. Well I’m just saying that because I have been too busy to notice much of the city. I haven’t even had time to see the “Occupy London” protests over at St. Paul’s. However, I have noticed how frustrating it is to live here – queuing everyday for everything, waiting 3 weeks to get the internet set up, trying not to elbow somebody in the face (because it’s so crowded on the tube and bus that you have no choice but to be constantly in other people’s personal space), choosing between the worst kind of food options (either unhealthy, expensive, or tasteless), or simply trying to understand what the hell everyone is saying! At least the weather hasn’t been so bad (seriously – everyone else is bundled up for winter, but it’s only like 12-15 deg C / 52-60 deg F). What has been annoying is that my body hasn’t been as healthy as I’d like it to be – I’ve been sick (ill) several times already. And my bed is not comfortable – my back has been achy for weeks, though it might have been due to me carrying my laptop with me every day because we didn’t have internet at home yet! Ugh.

That’s all for now, I’m trying to finish reading at least two books before getting dinner and going home.

...and I feel weird. And overwhelmed. Mostly overwhelmed by how much I have to do.
Finally found someone to move into the apartment. But I gotta patch up all the dart holes in the wall. I also need to cancel the utilities, but only after next month. Need to pack not only my clothes for this trip, but the stuff I want my mom to bring to me when she comes in September.
Having people over tonight to say bye. I'm so not ready.

Less than 2 weeks left in LA.

Saturday: Celebrated mother's day with Ferdie, Lisa, Auntie Cely, and of course mom. I drove us to Solvang/Santa Barabara. We had an early dinner at the famous (from the movie Sideways) restaurant the Hitching Post. Then ice cream filled us up in SB (McConnell's).

Returned to check my phone (I had left it at home the whole day). Picked up Steffen in downtown LA and headed to Hesperia, where we slept.

Sunday (yesterday): Jet skiing. It was awesome. I'm so lucky to have relatives who would gladly take me jet skiing just because I hadn't done it yet. It was also INCREDIBLY COLD AND WINDY. I was shivering the whole time. Had plenty of food there. Drove back in the afternoon. Steffen got to meet my family, haha.

Today: Brian's birthday. I gotta run, to meet him for lunch in Alhambra.

Also, still no luck finding someone for my apartment, still sending out couchsurfing requests for my trip, still not sure about what to do for Vegas tomorrow! Ugh. And I need to get a travel backpack and maps from AAA.

11 days ago I left my job. It all came so fast; I can't believe that it's been a week an a half already. I've now shifted from being pre-occupied with work stress to transitioning into moving out of my apartment and preparing for my 4-month-long journey. I'm also trying to see/enjoy as much of LA as I can before I leave, because I don't know where my life will take me after I get my Master's next year.

Right now I'm sitting at my desk in my room. On my birthday. You know how some people really try to downplay their birthday as if it's no big deal? Well, that's not me. I've been celebrating since Friday (my bday falling on a Monday isn't very convenient). So far, 25 people have posted on my wall and I'm really feeling the love. I'm just euphoric, in a comfortable sense. I love it. (Although, there is a kind of loneliness associated being with the center of attention, even when everyone is focused on you.)

My last day of work was April 20. That night, I went out to celebrate with Felix (who was also celebrating finishing a paper) and his friend Sam, who went to DC with him, and her roommate Anka. We went to BrewCo. Felix stayed at Sam's for the night, leaving me alone in the apartment at 2am. The next morning, I woke up with the spring's early sun and headed to traffic court. They couldn't do anything about my violation, so I had to return a week later to sort it out. I then headed home, where I was greeted with good news: My UK visa had been approved! Also, the autographs
from my ANTM appearance arrived in the mail! I received my paycheck for my flash mob! And finally, MY NEW CAMERA ARRIVED. Wow, unemployment is turning out to be the best thing ever.

That Friday, I stayed away from West LA, because President Obama was visiting, and frankly, whenever the president's in town, every single street within 5 miles is fucked up for hours. I thus spent the day hanging out with Brian, going first to Pie n Burger in Pasadena, then hung out at my apartment before Michelle joined us for a vegetarian Mexican dinner.

Saturday, my third day of unemployment, was a day trip to Joshua Tree National Park. I picked up Steffen and Christoph in Westwood before heading to Silver Lake to meet Michelle, and Lawrence ended up driving us there. We stopped at Jack in the Box, where we helped a man find his way to a funeral, and Del Taco (although there were several Del Taco locations closer to the park!). Joshua Tree was at first unimpressive, with a 3-mile hike leading us to a grove of palm trees. But, we then went to Split Rock, where we hiked behind to a massive field of undulating rock formations. It was very cool. Then we climbed Ryan Mountain (while playing "marry, kill, fuck" and getting "The Climb" stuck in our head), where we took in panoramic views of the verdant springtime desert below us. Our final stop in the park was a great vista point where we took in an amazing sunset. It suddenly became chilly, so we rushed back into the city, to Chili's, in fact. My mom had locked herself out of the house.

The next week was spent hanging out with friends, or going out with family. I drove from West LA back to Glassell to celebrate Easter at Tita Fanny's and at Tita Cris's. Dinner at Morton's Santa Ana for kuya Ferdie's birthday. What an amazing meal. I met up with Chris on Monday night after his work. He seemed really stressed and overwhelmed with all the work he has. I could tell that he's not himself (was I like that while working?). We went to Burbank (Lowe's) then got vegan shakes at Sage Organic, then had drinks back at my house. It was great to catch up. On Tuesday (April 26) I had lunch with my mom in Pasadena, because she got off work early (feeling ill). I then drove to downtown to scope out locations for Saturday's Amazing Race. I returned to West LA with some groceries from Trader Joe's, and I watched The IT Crowd and Weeds.

Wednesday, I stayed on the westside. The weather was really warm/hot and brilliantly sunny. It feels like summer. I went to Aaahs and hung around Santa Monica in the afternoon (again planning my Amazing Race). Then I met up with Ruben for dinner at Tara's. He can't make it to my weekend celebrations as he'll be in Vegas. Felix's friend Andy came over and we drank, played beer hockey and fuck the dealer (fick dich Felix). Sam came over later, bringing scones and staying the night.

Thursday, April 28: I went back to court. They didn't have my ticket in their system, so now I just have to check every 2 weeks to see if there's anything for me to do. (winning?) Met Felix and Andy in downtown afterwards; we had dim sum at Empress Pavilion, then explored Union Station, Olvera Street, and little Tokyo. I bought ramen for my still-ill mom.

On Friday, I made a run to Target to buy supplies for the race, then I went for a hike in Eaton Canyon (Altadena) with Fernand. The hike was much more intense than I thought it would be. It was all climbing over rocks and hopping across the rapidly flowing creek. I cut my legs twice, and Fernand fell completely in the water at one point. But the waterfall is really pretty. After that, we went to happy hour at the Yard House. Michelle M was there, then Vincent came, and Kim Y. and Omri, who had just learned that she was accepted to Berkeley! (Go Bears!) We then walked to Barney's Beanery; Alex M. met us there, bringing with him Joan, and then Brian showed up.

Saturday: MY AMAZING RACE DAY. I assembled the clues and it was great. Full recap to come later.


Music of the moment: The Girlfriend Season - Live While You're Young; New Order - Blue Monday; The Starting Line - Best of Me ("We got older, but we're still young / we never grew out of this feeling that we won't give up")